Identifying your Values
What values are most important to me and my family? Write them down. Identify them. Work on them. Make sure they read clearly. Once you have this list, the informationis invaluable. This is because it helps with almost all of your decision making moving forward. It becomes easier to say no to things without the guilt because you know you are prioritizing your decisions with your values, instead of not being sure why you do or do not want to do something.
Currently learning how to handle it when my values do not align with my friends values. I like the idea that says to trust the fact that they went through the same process to identify their own personal values and are making decisions that help support their list. This makes it easier to not look at your own list and decisions as "the right way" and theirs as "the wrong way." There can be a power in feeling personal comfortable and simultaneously respecting others decisions. For me, I have to remind myself of the above when I start to spiral towards judgment. I do not want to shame people for my own insecurities. It happens way too often. It's hard to identify this is what is happening in the moment but now that I have taken the time to think about it, this is exactly what happens. When someone is doing something different than I "think you should" (I have come to HATE the word should) I get defensive. This is probably because I am now questioniong if my decision aligns with my values. And if I am confused, I want to prove I am right.